Good Samaritans

By Will Carver

Published by Orenda Books https://orendabooks.co.uk/

Published on 15 September 2018

318 pages ISBN 9781912374373

I bought my Kindle copy from Amazon.

From the blurb

One crossed wire, three dead bodies and six bottles of bleach…

Seth Beauman can’t sleep. He stays up late, calling strangers from his phonebook, hoping to make a connection, while his wife, Maeve, sleeps upstairs. A crossed wire finds a suicidal Hadley Serf on the phone to Seth, thinking she is talking to the Samaritans.

But a seemingly harmless, late-night hobby turns into something more for Seth and for Hadley, and soon their late-night talks are turning into daytime meet-ups. And then this dysfunctional love story turns into something altogether darker, when Seth brings Hadley home…

And someone is watching…

Synopsis

Seth is a very troubled man.  He’s not particularly keen on his job or the people he works with and despises his younger boss who he would love to punch (or worse).  His big problem though is insomnia which rules his life.  When his wife is asleep, he gets out his home-made phone book and starts calling people to try and find someone, anyone, to talk to.  Occasionally, amongst the fuck off or weirdo responses he finds someone who is willing to indulge him; one night he speaks to Hadley and a real connection is made.

Hadley herself is also very troubled, feeling suicidal and believes she is speaking to a branch of the Samaritans when fate and crossed phone lines have linked her to Seth.  Speaking to Seth calms her down and she stops thinking of ending it all.  The next evening, she calls the Samaritans and asks to speak to Seth but instead speaks to Ant, at with she is unhappy and rings off.  This worries Ant, who still feels that he let down his best friend.  He crosses the line professionally and uses the details from her call to the Samaritans to trace her and then he starts to watch her, to ultimately stalk her.  He sees her get picked up at a night club for casual sex, follows them to her place and when the man leaves after ‘hit and run’ sex in her hallway he attacks him.

Seth and Hadley meet up and a relationship of sorts begins to develop, with Ant watching from a distance.  Maeve, Seth’s wife, realises that he is ‘up to his tricks’ again but will she stand by him?

All the time Maeve is becoming obsessed with the dark brooding DS Pace who is investigating a series of linked murders but making little progress.  Will she ever meet him in real life and how will he compare to Seth?

Another killing takes place and all the main characters are in some way embroiled in what follows. A trap is set but will the killer be caught?

My thoughts

Bloody hell.  What have I just read?

Where do I begin?  No this isn’t Love Story, far from it, though there is some love in a dysfunctional marriage, quite a lot of intimacy and some detailed descriptions of sexual activity.  So far so good.

The style is innovative in that it is told partly in first person and then halfway through the narrative switches to another first-person viewpoint.  The book is split into days and then the story is told in short sub chapters centring on one of the main characters in turn.  This may sound a little fiddly, but it works rather well and keeps up the unrelenting intensity for the reader.

Its dark, very dark and portrays the life and activity of a serial killer very matter-of-factly.  The violence is short and brutal without being too graphic; the lack of respect for the victim’s remains as they have indignities inflicted on them as forensic evidence is removed is chilling though.  There’s bleach, lots of it, I guess from now on I’ll take note of other people’s trollies during the weekly shop.

To pinch the old footballing cliché this was certainly a book of two halves. 

The first half trots along and we find out about the main characters of the story.  There’s Seth the computer hardware salesman who suffers from chronic insomnia and has the dubious hobby of phoning random strangers at night just for someone to talk to.  Maeve his long-suffering wife spends her evenings sprawled out in front of the telly consuming copious amounts of wine until drunken oblivion is achieved.  Then there’s fragile Hadley whose self-esteem and self-respect are rock bottom, so she resorts to self-harming and thoughts of suicide.  There’s also Ant who volunteers evenings at the Samaritans and harbours thoughts of guilt after his friend kills himself by hanging from a door during a sex act. 

Seth wants to be with Hadley; Ant wants to save her from herself.  Maeve longs for the troubled DS Pace, who is floundering with his serial killer, who she sees every night on her television and Pace just wants to get his man.

Then halfway through like a switch has been flicked the plot goes berserk and slips into overdrive. The identity of the serial killer is revealed to the reader after hints and red herrings earlier.  A main character is murdered, and the reaction of the others is somewhat surprising as actions escalate from there.  Each new plot twist will make you think WTF as it turns in another unsuspecting direction.

Another unusual aspect is that the policeman DS Pace’s role is somewhat a bit part.  This is no police procedural with forms filled and protocols followed.

Then as we come to the denouement there’s one final slap across the chops for the reader.

Stunning stuff in more ways than one, but I couldn’t read 3 or 4 like this consecutively I’m too delicate!  I have the next novel ready to read but I think I’ll leave it for while for now, but I’ll definitely be back.

The Disappearing Act #CatherineSteadman #TheDisappearingAct

By Catherine Steadman

Published by Simon & Schuster https://www.simonandschuster.co.uk/books/The-Disappearing-Act/Catherine-Steadman/9781471189784

Publishing date 24 June 2021

312 pages ISBN 97814711899784

I read an uncorrected proof copy provided by the publisher.  Many thanks to Jess for organising that for me.

From the blurb

It all starts with a simple favour.  Who wouldn’t help a stranger in need?

British actor Mia Eliot is in LA for pilot season.  This is her chance to make it in Hollywood, and she is ready to do whatever it takes.  At an audition she meets Emily, and a favour takes a dark turn when Emily goes missing and Mia is the last person to see her.

Then a woman turns up, claiming to be Emily, but she is nothing like what Mia remembers.  Why would someone pretend to be Emily?  She starts a desperate and dangerous search for answers, knowing something is very, very wrong.

In an industry where everything is about creating illusions, how do you know what is real?  And how much would you risk to find out?

Synopsis

Mia finds out that she has been deserted by her long-term partner just as she is told by her agent that she has a BAFTA nomination.  The agent suggests a trip to LA to attend some auditions during the pilot season when new shows are cast, if she doesn’t get a role at least there will be publicity for her.  Mia sees it as a chance to get over her partner George, after all what could go wrong?

Mia is thrust into the glitz of showbiz LA with the flash cars, parties, and gifts for influencers.  During the wait for one of her auditions Mia befriends Emily and ends up doing her a favour by feeding a parking meter and his left with her purse and car keys when Emily seemingly disappears.  Mia enlists the help of others, but Emily is not immediately found, and some cannot even recall her existence.  After a couple of days of auditions and trying to find her Mia goes back to the car and finds the rental document bearing a phone number which she calls.

When Emily turns up at Mia’s rental apartment, she seems different; Mia is convinced it is a different woman.  She also notices that items are being moved or disappearing from the apartment which convinces her she needs to get to the bottom of the mystery and pursue the fake Emily.  This exposes Mia to great danger which comes to a head in the Hollywood hills.

My thoughts

They say write about what you know which explains why so many of Steven King’s novels have writers in them and why I, an accountant, have never seen fit to put pen to paper.  This is Catherine Steadman’s third novel and the first to be based on her first career of acting. 

I enjoyed her first novel ‘Something in the Water’ which I read earlier this year and this book follows in a similar style.  The prose is unfussy, and the plot appears relatively straightforward but with a few twists making for an entertaining if undemanding read. There is plenty of incident and intrigue to keep the reader interested without being padded out.  The plot could easily be one used by Alfred Hitchcock during his heyday, a missing person who may not be and a lot to self-doubt for the heroine, though he would have made it more of a psychological thriller whereas here the paranoia is dialled down a few notches.  No doubt this story will be optioned for the big screen shortly and would produce an effective vehicle for a young actress.

The heroine, Mia, has just been nominated for a BAFTA for her role in Jane Eyre and there is a clear inference that Jane’s traits of stoicism and tenacity are transferred to Mia, though I’m sure that Jane would not have been has naïve as her.  The setting for the missing person set piece being at an audition is quite clever in that naturally those seeking to be cast in the role will look broadly similar and dress according to the character role.  After a day of seeing people for the same role to the casual on looker it would likely appear that they all merge into one and individuals become less memorable.

The novel provides insight into the ruthlessness needed to be a success in the profession and highlight the vulnerability of young actresses in an industry where predators still hold power.  The #MeToo movement is relevant to the plot but is handled with a light touch and doesn’t plunge the book into excessive darkness.  Perhaps I read too much Noir, I’m sure there will be a very dark novel grounded in #MeToo but this one isn’t it.  It tries to stay in the LA of bright lights not that of the shadows and Philip Marlowe.

Having read 2 of Ms Steadman’s 3 novels it appears that she is developing a distinct style of pragmatic heroine who is willing to have their scruples stretched to come out at a suitable conclusion.  This is no bad thing, as the world becomes more complex and competitive few heroes are truly whiter than white.  I also like it when I am proved wrong and one character, I was convinced would turn out to be a ‘wrong un’ did not!

I’m sure that this novel will appear to a great many people, fans of Catherine Steadman and probably fans of Downton Abbey, along with those fascinated with the glamour of Hollywood. The Disappearing Act is ideal holiday entertainment, it’s just a pity that so few of us can take it on one in these Covid times.

The Rabbit Factor

By Antti Tuomainen

Translated by David Hackston

Published by Orenda Books https://orendabooks.co

Publishing date 28 October 2021 https://orendabooks.co.uk/product/the-rabbit-factor

288 pages ISBN 9781913193874

I read an uncorrected proof copy provided by the publisher.  Many thanks to Karen for organising that for me.

From the blurb

What makes life perfect?  Insurance mathematician Henri Koskinen knows the answer because he calculates everything down to the very last decimal.

And then, for the first time, Henri is faced with the incalculable.  After suddenly losing his job, Henri inherits an adventure park from his brother – its peculiar employees and troubling financial problems included.  The worst of the financial issues appear to originate from big loans taken from criminal quarters…and some dangerous men are very keen to get their money back.

But what Henri really can’t compute is love.  In the adventure park, Henri crosses paths with Laura, an artist with a chequered past, and a joie de vivre and erratic lifestyle that bewilders him.  As the criminals go to extreme lengths to collect their debts and as Henri’s relationship with Laura deepens, he finds himself faced with situations and emotions that simply cannot be pinned down on his spreadsheets.   

Synopsis

Henri, an insurance company actuary, is faced with the bane of modern office life, a new operating policy which is both touchy-feely and peppered with corporate newspeak.  Henri just wants to get on with is job and produce his calculations with skill and care to detail.  This is not possible, and he is essentially tricked into resigning.

A couple of weeks into a fruitless job search he is visited by a lawyer who is bearing the bad news of the death of his brother (Juhani), who is rarely in touch with, who has left him his adventure park.

It quickly becomes clear that the adventure park is not doing as well as it seems, attendances are good but there is a big black hole in its finances.  Whilst he is pondering over this conundrum matter get worse by the arrival of criminals who are asking for the €220,000 that he owes them.  It seems Juhani liked to play poker, somewhat badly, and borrowed €200,000 which had already clocked up €20,000 in interest.  Henri points out that this is hardly a normal rate of interest and they make it clear that they are no normal bankers and expect him to pay up right away.

The solution to his problems includes money laundering and setting up a pay day loans bank, which he pitches to the boss of the criminal organisation.  This proves to be a temporary reprieve, but ultimately his problems need to be eliminated, requiring actions currently outside his skill set.

The added complication is the artist Laura who is currently working as the park manager but who harbours a chequered past.  Laura shows him some of life that he is missing and starts to awaken things inside him that he cannot describe or understand.  He is falling in love with her.

Can he manage to solve his financial problems and save the park without losing Laura?

My thoughts

In my last review (Blood and Cinders) I noted that I rarely pay attention to book covers, that one being an exception, when lo and behold there’s another cracker.  Karen from the publisher posted it on Twitter and it piqued my interest, and the blurb promised a wacky read.  Spotting I’m an accountant she said she love to hear what I thought of it and was kind enough to send me proof copy, and what an enjoyable read it was.

The plot unfurls from Henri’s own peculiar first-person perspective in which the translation runs fluidly in short chapters that maintain the reader’s attention.  The characters are a likeable bunch of oddballs and Henri as the narrator is engaging, you want to see how his life unfolds.

The humour is subtle and in the style of the Ealing Comedies of the 1950’s rather than brash and modern, though there are moments that nod towards Fawlty Towers in particular with one scene.  The humour is clever in that it comes from Henri’s perspective and is skewed by his way of thinking such as when he is pondering over the fate of the park shortly after inheriting it.  From his work in insurance, he knows that some people commit arson and then perform Onanism nearby, but ‘didn’t imagine such actions would achieve the results’ he needed.  He also muses that he leaves his workplace that is turning into a playground only to inherit one.

Accountants are universally regarded as boring and are held up to comic ridicule (often rightly so).  Where we gain comfort is that people who find accounting too adventurous end up as actuaries.  That is an accountant joke; there’re not many.  Henri is a particularly uptight one.  His parents were Bohemian, his brother feckless so it seems quite logical that he would find comfort on something as rigid and reliable as mathematics.  Coping mechanisms are restrictive though and this limits Henri’s experiences, it’s his incomprehension and ultimate awakening that makes this a feel-good book.  He inadvertently allows his oddball staff to grow and become happier.

Can I relate to him?  To a degree yes, years of study in early adulthood mean you can miss out on some experiences.  I have sat in the restaurant like him and done the mental calculations on the food and drink presented, in his case the overpriced high end one whereas I have tended to do this on all-inclusive holidays trying to figure out how they make a profit!  To date I have not picked a restaurant for a date on an optimal basis of average reviews, distance from respective bus stops, the weather, day of the week, time of the year and liking for spicy food though.  That was a great touch as was the cost benefit analysis of the furniture quality and quantity per square foot of his flat.  Daft, yes but I did work with a chap who once he had driven what he considered ‘average’ mileage in year (in his case only 6,000) he garaged it until the new year.

This is a fun, quirky book of the lightest shade of Scandi-Noir that should be savoured with a cinnamon bun and a decent cup of coffee.